Chronicles of ThatGoddamnedCat- Meet LuckyBastard my Chipmunk Friend


Let’s face it, a nurses job is never done. This morning I’m having coffee with my new furry chipmunk friend who’s convalescing from an unexpected play date with ThatGoddamnedCat.

I affectionately named her LuckyBastard for obvious reasons, and I’m pretty sure she’s going to make it, as there’s no evidence of broken skin or internal bleeding. Unfortunately, I can’t completely rule out internal injuries because my rodent CT machine is down.

Plus, I’m obviously bullshitting you, because I don’t actually have that much needed piece of equipment that every cat owner should totally own.

And yes, I praised ThatGoddamnedCat for bringing dinner home.

He knows I hate to cook on Fridays.

Brownie points to ThatGoddamnedCat.

The dogs are going absolutely berserk at the moment, because I have LuckyBastard on the kitchen table hanging out in nurse Gina’s ICU for-unfortunate-play-dates-of-ThatGoddamnedCat, which is actually just a warm towel in a tall Hollister bag.

Her yummy chipmunk smell is driving them both batshitcrazy.


Actually, Sketch who’s three is the one who’s pacing and nosing around like a juvenile spider money on crack. I honestly don’t think Tucker (12y/o German Shepherd)  even cares, because he’s retired from hunting prey and all other unnecessary dog related nonsense. Also, the poor guy can’t see or hear very well. He lives to chill out and protect the house.

I’m pretty sure he’s only anxious because he’s picking up batshitcrazy little dogs vibes. In fact, his poop just fell out, so I’m like 100% convinced it’s pure anxiety.

*Poop falling out is distinctly different than pooping on the kitchen floor, because this particular dog would never ever do that. He’s simply a well-mannered geriatric fellow who got anxious and well… shit happens.

Truth be told, I think this brainy canine who’s uber awesome in every way, had like one (maybe two) accidents in his entire lifetime.

We brought him home at 6 weeks and POOF! he was potty trained. He’s smarter than most people and a helluva lot easier to train than a human child.

I’m pretty sure he’s still humiliated over that one or two accidents he had when he was a pup, because if I remember correctly, his expression was all like…. “Ohhhh… you want me to go out there?? Why didn’t you just say so, master… I understand over a hundred different languages. Where’s the paper towels and carpet spray? I shall clean it up.”

And that was that.

The little guy on the other hand, who’s a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel was obviously bred exclusively for companionship and keeping humans warm because his only assets are a viable heart beat, cuteness and ability to snuggle.

End of story.

I’m not complaining though. Adorable, snuggly companions who don’t sass, talk back or ask for money are hard to come by.

Back to LuckyBastard. She’s resting comfortably nestled in her Hollister bag where this strapping young beach dude is protecting her. Her breathing is fast, but regular and reflexes seem to be intact.


I think she’s going to be fine.

I’m glad she stopped by to visit.

Mornings are anything but boring around here.

The following has been yet another adventure from… The Chronicles of ThatGoddamned Cat.

The end.


For more adventures starring ThatGoddamnedCat click here Adventures of ThatGoddamnedCat and here Toasted Mouse and here Here, Birdie Birdie

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6 thoughts on “Chronicles of ThatGoddamnedCat- Meet LuckyBastard my Chipmunk Friend

  1. Pingback: Not a Creature was Stirring: Holiday Chronicles of ThatGoddamnedCat | Extreme Mom

  2. Pingback: Twas the First Day of School… | Extreme Mom

  3. Why is it so LONELY down here in your comments? *** tumbleweed rolls by *** You are consistently HYSTERICAL!!! And by that I mean funny hysterical, though something also tells me you are frequently, JUST hysterical. — But I digress. —- Could I persuade you to put a BELL on the collar of thatgoddamnedcat? It would make me, for one, feel a LOT better. PLEASE???

    TGDC will still get plenty of exercise chasing, just a lower kill rate. (zero if you are lucky)

    Also, I have two sweet old dogs, like Tucker, 13 and 14. “Uber awesome in every way, had like one (maybe two) accidents in his entire lifetime” And actually one of the two has NEVER had an accident. But the larger one had one the first day I got her, 13 years ago, cuz she had been starving when I found her, and I fed her, and naturally her system went ba-zerk . . . and one last week. (weird) At least I THINK it was her. I was watching a neighbors dog in my house and suddenly there is a big pile of poop. SURELY it was the neighbors dog (who had already peed on the floor twice) EXCEPT that the poop was much more voluminous than should be for either the neighbors dog, OR my other angel. So I accepted it was my larger “uber awesome in every way” dog, but strictly speaking, there is no real proof. —– Just sayin’

    There, now it’s not so empty down here.

    I’m serious about the cat bell though. STOP THE CARNAGE!!!!

    ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤


    • Thank you for decorating the huge black hole in my comments section. Most of my posts are ghost towns… ridden with tumbleweed and abandoned structures. Then again, I do have a thing for apparitions!

      For the record, I’m seriously considering the bell thing and there will most definitely be a post in honor of that very special occasion!!


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