Guess how many… CONDOMS

Hump Day Activity

You know that game where you have to guess how many jelly beans or other types of candy are in a jar?

We’re going to play…

How many condoms are in this box?

Yup. Seriously.

They’re in my actual possession right now.

I’m going to love my new job as…

The condom nurse. (not exclusively, but sort of)

Fortunately, it’s a hands OFF teaching kinda thing.


I felt the need to clarify THAT.

I’m not gonna lie, I’m totally looking forward to being INSTANTLY popular.

Anyway, getting back to the counting game-

How many condoms are in this box?

*Enough to distract this entire counties high school football teams from video games for a few hours. (Yes, only a FEW hours. I’m taking a wild guess that those young men are super fast)

*More than Justin Bieber could use in 10,000 sad sorry lifetimes.

*Enough to make a balloon animal as tall as the Statue of Liberty.

*Enough to burn a gazillion calories.

*A savings to the welfare system that could potentially pay off the national debt.

*Enough to fill the drawers of Bill Clinton’s FAMOUS desk.

*Enough to keep a porn star out of the ER for one or two phases of the moon.

*Enough to get the Energizer Bunny through one breeding season without having to celebrate Father’s Day.

*Enough to hit each member of congress with a water-filled replica of themselves… 10 times.

*Enough to last through an entire fantasy date with Channing Tatum.

*Enough to construct an inflatable life raft for the President of the United States. He would totally sink.  I hear he’s an excellent swimmer.

Dear Secret Service guys reading my awesome blog, no need to put me on ‘the list’. Also, feel free to contact me for a free raincoat.

Hint- It’s a larger number than it appears to be and if they were my husbands condoms, he would definitely have enough leftover to make a nice pillow for his coffin.

12 thoughts on “Guess how many… CONDOMS

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